Examples

BUDIMIR MALEŠIĆ, WAR HERO FROM OZREN, CHAMPION AMONG ATHLETES WITH DISABILITIES
Always Hear the Higher Word
He had a black belt in karate and open roads. Behind the hill there was a rumble, the earth was crumbling apart, evil was coming. He refused to leave. ”Who will protect these children? What will happen, and what will be left of us, if we all leave?” One December morning in a hidden minefield, he lost both his legs. Then he stepped on a completely different path, which is still ongoing and not for the weak. In table tennis, one of his areas of self-preservation, he won over a hundred medals and fifty trophies

By: Aleksa Komet
Photo: Archive of the Interviewee

They told him it was better to go over... there are places for people like him... he’s a karateka, a black belt, a young man... people like him are sought for everywhere. They told him that chaos was brewing here... there would be war, everything would break. Then, once everything calms down... then he can go back, if he wants to.
He asked them: ”And who will defend these people, protect these children around Ozren?” He asked them: ”What will happen if we all leave? Who will stay... and what will be left behind?”
They didn’t answer, they didn’t hear him... they left.
That morning, they set off on a mission. Like an evil that hides under the ground and waits patiently, the mine exploded and tore off both of his legs – the right one below, and the left one above the knee. It cried like a human... instead of him.
– It was on December 4, on the holiday of the Presentation of the Most Holy Mother of God. Nobody thought about it then. They moved from action to action. I suffered and thanks to our Bishop, I was born again.
That is when the journey began, which in a way still continues the direction of which is guided by hospital corridors. From Doboj, through Banja Luka, to Zemun, Belgrade...
– Both legs were torn off, but the doctors soon noticed that the condition was getting worse. On top of all the suffering I developed sepsis, and gangrene started. I was in a coma for three days. They transferred me to Serbia and, fortunately, the doctors and staff of the Zemun Hospital managed to stop further tissue decay.
The misfortune was enormous. It seemed to him that he had lost half his body, and he needed to continue living.
– Everything came to my mind then. Thoughts arrive that always make you feel worse, memories that appear only to torment you... I asked myself where I would go like this. I imagined myself as I had been – young, full of strength, karateka, black belt, first day. I had a family, a wife and two daughters... and this heart in my chest. It beat in my chest... and then it calmed down and started telling me: that it was not in vain, that it had to be like this and that I had to move on. I listened to my heart and today I don’t feel sorry for anything. I fought for my people, I gave them more than I thought I could, I was one of those who stayed, and the great God wanted everything to be as it was.
Next to him was his family that was able to provide him with comfort and support.

DISCOVERY OF TABLE TENNIS

He tried to stand up with prostheses and succeeded. When that already happened, then the spirit of the former robust athlete began to stir in him again. On the recommendation of the War and Military Invalids of Belgrade, he started playing table tennis.
– Table tennis was mostly something secondary in my previous life. Just an incidental recreation and I couldn’t even imagine that it would fill my life so much after everything that happened. Slowly, I began to discover something completely new, for which I obviously had considerable talent, something that suddenly began to give new meaning to my days. For seven years I played on prostheses, suffered pain, bled, but I did not give up. It was only on the doctor’s recommendation that I sat in the wheelchair so that my hips would not be damaged, but I was excellent in that situation as well.
Victories in domestic competitions ensued, soon followed by the invitation of the selector of the table tennis national team for people with disabilities.
– I played at numerous competitions, World Cups, World Championship in Slovakia, where we won a bronze medal, which is the most valuable result in my career. Then we beat Germany, the current Olympic champion. In fifteen years of playing table tennis, I won more than a hundred medals and fifty cups at domestic and international competitions, gaining several national championship titles.
Due to his great results, he received a national recognition and a sports pension.
– Table tennis gave me the opportunity to get a job in sports. For twelve years I led the Table Tennis Club for the Disabled of Belgrade, and I was also the president of the Association for Sports for the Disabled of Belgrade.
In accordance with the possibilities, Budimir tries to perform numerous life routines independently, not wanting to draw attention to the handicap he is facing, nor the experience he carries within himself.

NIGHTS ARE ESPECIALLY HARD

– What happened to me has determined my life for more than twenty-five years. It stopped me in many wishes, plans, ideas, but it gave me the opportunity to show the strength of character in completely different circumstances and not to be a man waiting for someone’s pity and help arising from that.
Everything that Budimir is able to convey from his experience is all the more important, because his struggles with bodily problems, unfortunately, are not over yet. On the contrary. In recent years, the consequences of the tragedy he experienced on the battlefield in Bosnia in the old days are becoming more and more severe.
– The main nerve in the leg then suffered great damage and to this day we have not been able to solve that problem. For a long time, I felt it as a secondary pain, but it became stronger with age, and in the last couple of years it became more and more difficult to bear. That is why I am not able to play table tennis as much as I used to. We were unable to overcome the neurinoma that formed at the end of the severed nerve even after several surgeries. It is now mentioned as an option to install a nerve stimulator that would relieve pain. The nights are especially hard. Sometimes it seems to me as if someone is ripping off a piece of meat with pliers. But every moment of relief brings me new hope that a solution might still be found for this torment.
And here we are again that morning, on the feast of the Presentation of the Holy Mother of God, with all those important and unimportant characters, with the roar of a buried mine, instead of his.
– God knows why everything happened like that and the Mother of God who gave birth to me for a new life that morning. I tell those who do not believe in God to at least do good deeds and let them believe in the power of nobility. And to those who believe in God, I want them to never forget his sacrifice and his teachings. And let them remember the words: ”I will be with you until the end of the world!”

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Family
– My family, my wife and daughters, taught me strength and perseverance. The wife took on a great family burden, so she got sick herself, but fortunately she is fine now. Growing up of my daughters made me struggle with the anguish of ugly feelings. God gave me to watch them grow before my eyes, how they mature and influence that. For one parent, that is the most important thing. They both finished school, the older one is in Greece, the younger one is in Belgrade.

***

Incessant Struggle
– No one who has not gone through similar situations is able to understand what mental challenges people with such serious disabilities face. How close they are to despair, depression, feelings of hopelessness. That is why on many occasions I tried to point out to them how important it is to preserve the spirit, when our body is already damaged. How important it is to deal with something that will save us from the rut of disability. Alcohol, lethargy and dismay are always at hand and many, unfortunately, reach for it. But it is just a new blow to ourselves, stronger and heavier day by day, because we tend to be ruthless towards ourselves. People who have such difficulties, long for peace and comfort, long for some new meaning in their lives, and it can be found only by searching, persistent and difficult, which in the end always pays off.